"No socks, great style..." (re-post 3.24.10)

Sunshine: the shining of the sun; direct light of the sun.  2.) brightness or radiance; cheerfulness or happiness. 3.) a source of cheer or happiness.

The Rascals

In 1968 four young men from Garfield, New Jersey known as The Rascals (they were previously known as The Young Rascals) released their Billboard hit "A Beautiful Morning". The song reached number three on the Billboard charts and became a RIAA-certified Million Seller on June 28, 1968. The song opens with wind chimes and bells, and the unique and highly popular voice of Felix Cavaliere singing these words:

"It's a beautiful mornin' ahhh
I think I'll go outside a while
An jus' smile
Just take in some clean fresh air boy
Ain't no sense in stayin' inside
If the weather's fine an' you got the time
It's your chance to wake up and plan another brand new day
Either way
It's a beautiful mornin' ahhh."

listen

If you just listened to the song it is very evident to the ear the carefree optimism that was reminiscent of their past hit Groovin' and what would become the trademark of The Rascals.

With the tremendous weather we in Ohio, specifically Columbus, have been experiencing the last three days, that has been nothing short of wonderful, I felt this song was an appropriate and a timely reminder how something as simple as sunshine can improve our outlook. Many of us are lifted just bit higher by its mere presents and our lows are reduced and not quite as low when the sun decides to stay for an extended period of time. During sun filled days in February that are unseasonably warm, and remind us of an early springtime day, our disposition can be drastically changed.

Florida sunrise...

Psalm 19:4-6 has one of the best descriptions of the sun that I have ever read:

"The sun lives in the heavens where God placed it. It bursts forth like a radiant

bridegroom after a wedding. It rejoices like a great athlete eager to run a race. The sun rises at one end of the heavens and follows its course to the other end. Nothing can hide from its heat."

I think is safe to say that many of us, if not all of us, love the sunshine and the warmth that it brings. I know I do. For me the sun always reminds me of the years I lived in West Palm Beach, Florida. I loved it there. The sunny days down in south Florida reminds me of many things, but one thing that I have carried with me since my days in Florida, fashion speaking, is how much I love wearing loafers without socks.

Yes, a loafer without socks is what I just said.

My opening made references to The Rascals and their musical talents, and acknowledged the Bible just to get to this point.

The point that I love the sunshine and the simple fact that I feel it is very fashion forward to wear trousers- yes I said trousers - with loafers and no socks.

So with this I decided to re-post a piece I wrote on March 24, 2010. It was the second piece I wrote on mybabyroc.

The piece was entitled, "No socks, great style..."

I hope you enjoy the piece... and the sun. (sbb . 556)

"No socks, great style..."

Style: an elegant, fashionable, or luxurious mode of living.

The first thing I noticed when I glanced at this picture was these aren't my kids. Anytime I see a picture with kids in it and their not mine I'm truly relieved. Get the picture? I have a lot of kids. Many evenings when we venture out to eat it's not unusual for everyone but the wait staff to call me dad...I mean really, it looks like a flippin United Nations meeting when we all sit down and break bread (literally & metaphorically). Secondly, I noticed  the "no socks"...a personal favorite of mine. When I lived in West Palm Beach, Fla. I would often see well dressed men with a tan that only Giorgio Armani & George Hamilton would envy wearing "no socks" with loafers and a blazer. Images of the Kennedy boys running around Palm Beach in their khaki poplin suits wearing loafers and "no socks" , chasing women around with more than just bare ankles often floated through my mind. Those kind of guys always look so rich...my wife says they look so rich because they are so rich. 

She has a point.

Even though the guy in the picture is wearing saddle shoes ( Loafers, saddle shoes...enough already...I'm starting to sound/feel like Carrie Bradshaw) he strikes me as a man that takes fashion serious. A man with a certain distinctive taste, a man that has style...add a bow tie and he would really be GQ.

sbb 24.3.10

250 

American Boy . Estelle . feat Kanye West

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Google Love

Profound: penetrating or entering deeply into subjects of thought or knowledge; having deep insight or understanding: a profound thinker. (2) originating in or penetrating to the depths of one's being; profound grief. (3) being or going far beneath what is superficial, external, or obvious: profound insight.

Please read the piece first then click onto this link and observe true love. You will not regret it.

Peace & Love

Earlier this week I wrote a piece on love entitled; "Love: 2 becoming 1". The piece was inspired in part by Valentine's Day and a sermon (CWC - 2.12.11) by our pastor this past Sunday. The piece was also inspired by the question I posed in the previous post and the same question that has been on my mind all week.

What is love?

The Beatles told us that you can't buy it and Tina Turner asked us what does it have to do with anything. And with that, like all great research, I turned to the almighty Google for help. And when I Googled the word love 2,940,000,000 results appeared in 10 seconds.

Wikipedia's definition topped the search list for love. 

Go figure.

Gamble...

Wanting to get a clearer understanding of the word I visited two of my sturdiest and truest friends: Merriam and Webster. Merriam-Webster defines love as "a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person or a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend."

 

I love the word "profoundly". It is such a descriptive and powerful word.

Perspective & Passionate...

As I continued on my search, and research, for a deeper meaning and for true insight into the concept of love I was reminded that no research can be complete without conferring with the Greeks.

Thank you Wittenberg University. I took a Greek Mythology course my freshman year.

And my parents thought they wasted their hard earned money sending me to college.

Please.

Anyway, the Greeks have the love thing down.

As many of you are well aware of there are three types of love that are commonly referred to in ancient Greek. 

They are Agape, Eros & Philia.

Appreciation & Attachment...

Much has been written on each of these 'types" of love, but for the sake of time, and sanity, I want to give a small, very small, overview of what each one means. 

Agape in the King James Version of the New Testament is translated to mean charity which has a contemporary connotation of giving to meet the needs of the less fortunate. When the early Christians refereed to agape love they were speaking to the "self-sacrificing" love God had for all humanity, which they were to reciprocate and practice towards God and among all people. In the end, God's love is unconditional, sacrificial and all encompassing. As 1 John 4:8 states; "God is love".

Eros is the type of love that most of us are very familiar with, and the one that is displayed on the grocery store newsstand, on the TV and the silver screen. Eros is the educated term for the human sexual desires that reside in the depths of all of us; it's a nice way of saying lust. From this Greek term the word erotic is derived and the phrases "love sick" and "love at first sight" are born. Though this type of "love" is, and can be, overwhelming and addictive it has no emotional depth or lasting value. No relationship can stand upon this foundation.

Philia means friendship in Modern Greek. From Philia Philadelphia finds is name and its trademark motto: "The City of Brotherly Love." Philia type of love is about loyalty to friends, family, and community, and requires virtue, equality and familiarity. Aristotle divided Philia, or friendship, into three areas, based on the reason why the relationship was formed: friendships of utility, friendships of pleasure and friendships of the good. As we can see Aristotle realized a long time ago that not all friendships are created equal. I would pay to hear Aristotle's commentary on facebook and the depth of the so called "friendships" on this "social network". The motto for all social networks should be; "You got 20 minutes? I'd like to tell you about myself." Upon further review, maybe that should be the motto for people that like to blog? Anyway, the facebook thing can be a topic for another day. I will say this, facebook feeds into the human condition that many people need to be heard on so many different levels. Many, not all, people on facebook want to submit every aspect of their lives for public consumption. Facebook, as well as twitter, are a narcissist's nirvana. Aristotle would classify the reason why facebook friendships are formed is because of need; a need to be heard and on some level to have our daily actions affirmed and validated. I currently have 1188 "facebook friends"... go figure. Any other time I would explain the reasons for my many facebook contacts, but at this moment neither do I feel compelled to nor do I entertain the desire to share my reasons. I think that is a very high browed way of saying "I'm not really sure why I have so many FB friends."

"Love is saying I have you covered."

Let's reign this piece back in, facebook is not where I wanted to go this morning.

The reason I was talking about friendship in the first place was because the Greeks spoke of three different types of love, and in my research on love I wanted to gather as much information from as many sources, and resources, as I could.

So with that I would like to extend a special thanks to Google, Webster's, Aristotle, Wikipedia, Facebook, the Beatles and Tina Turner for your thoughts, philosophies and opinions.

They were greatly appreciated.

But as much as the resources mentioned were helpful I was still left with the same question: What is Love?

Profoundly together?

As many of you know that have read any of my thoughts in the past that my research often, scratch that, always begins and ends with God's word. 
 
Today is no different.

Whether you read the bible or not we all have heard 1 Corinthians 13 recited at many of the weddings we have attended in the past. 1 Corinthians is considered the love chapter in the bible and though I would suggest reading the entire chapter (don't worry, it is only 13 verses long) I want to focus on verses 4 through 7 and point out what I think are the three main ingredients to what love truly is.

"Love is patient and kind."

-1 Cor.13:4

The first trait of true and authentic love is selflessness. It is impossible to be selfish and in love at the same time, it is like swimming in the ocean while trying not to get wet. It is impossible. Out of the three traits that I will share in the following paragraphs this is one I embodied the most in the past. I was a very selfish person. The sad thing is I didn't even realize it. It isn't really a shock that my past relationships failed. I was a selfish person and everyone around me suffered the consequences for my actions. Love is truly selfless; it is putting others ahead and above of one self. I'm not talking about false modesty, entertaining a low self esteem or becoming a martyr, what I'm simply stating is that we need to have a sober assessment of ourselves and realize that our needs do not trump others. Many things fall under the category of selflessness, but simply put, people who routinely and habitually view others more important than themselves are truly selfless.

"Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way."

-1 Cor. 13: 4-5

If selfless is the arm on the body of love then humility is the hand; it is impossible to be selfless without being humble. Humility is the key to all successful relationships. Having the ability to give up our right to be right when a disagreement arises is what mature relationships are built upon. Selflessness and humility go hand in hand. And with that said, there is nothing more attractive than a humble spirit and a humble person.

"Love is not irritable, and keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustices but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never losses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance."

- 1 Cor. 13: 5-7

True love is unconditional. A lot was said in those verses, but it always comes back to enduring, never giving up and never losing faith. You can do none of those things if your love is conditional. God is the greatest example of this kind of love known to mankind. He gives us his love freely, without judgment and with a full measure of grace and mercy. God's gift of love cost us nothing and cost Him everything. John 3:16-17 states; "For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone that believes in him will not perish but have eternal life. God did not send his Son into the world to condemn it, but to save it."  True love is truly unconditional.

Warm embrace...

So there it is love is selfless, humble and unconditional.

But remember, to display this type of love that embodies all three of theses quantities and characteristics takes time; it takes patience. Its important that we develop patience with ourselves, but it is paramount that we are patient with others. The best way I know how to accomplish this is through prayer and taking the time to become the right person instead spending great amounts of time looking for the right person.

It takes patience. 

In the King James Version of the bible "love" is refereed to 314 times. Out of the 185 times love is mentioned in the New Testament 140+ deal with sacrificial love. 

Jesus Christ is the greatest example of sacrificial love.

Finally, men and women are completely different. I know, shock right!

Innocent & Tender...

Women speak about 30,000 words a day, where as men speak roughly 10,000 words a day (the numbers are debatable, but most research uncovers that women talk 3 times the amount of men). Women are perfectly familiar with every aspect of their children's lives; men know their kids name... most of the time. Women on average have 363 products that they use in their bathroom; a man has about 6.

We men grunt, we are clueless and we stink... go figure.

In the end God created men and women very differently, and how we love and perceive love is going to be challenging at times, but when all is said and done -and usually more is said than done- the love that is displayed the greatest among individuals is the love that is in constant pursuit of selflessness, humility and unconditional parameters and boundaries. 

If we are to imagine for a brief moment that selflessness, humility and unconditional love are passengers in the car of love then sacrifice is the air in the tires and the gas in the tank.

Love cannot operate without sacrifice.

Sacrifice...

As you finish this piece go to, or call, your spouse or love one and let them know how much you love them. Hug them and look them in the eye, if possible, and say with all the meaning and conviction you can muster; "I Love You". Then quietly begin the journey of living out and displaying sacrificial love in your life on a daily basis. That will be the greatest gift that you will ever give to the people you profess to love. 

What is love you ask? Love is sacrifice.

I know, I Googled it.

Awesome...

sbb  17.2.11
1986

Truly  .  Lionel Richie

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Love: 2 becoming 1

Together: in cooperation; with united action; conjointly: to undertake a task together.

As Valentine's Day makes it yearly rounds many of us are again cornered by cupid for just a small moment and we are summoned to answer the little question that swirls around inside our head: What is love?

As I ponder that question I can tell you right off the bat that I'm not going to try to write a long and exhaustive piece on such a huge topic.

What I do want to share is one of the best sermons I've ever heard on love. This morning at Cypress Wesleyan Church, the church our family attends, Senior Pastor, Ken Murphy, discussed and educated everyone in attendance on the finer points of a relationship between a husband and wife.  

Today's sermon is part of an ongoing series entitled "The Cleavers vs. the Kardashians."

I take notes every Sunday... this Sunday was no different. 

Let me share.

Before I share this morning's notes and discuss marriage I think it's important to acknowledge the very beginning, the genesis if you will, of the institution we call marriage. In the beginning God created and ordained the institution of marriage. Genesis 2:19-24 states:

 ¹⁹ Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. ²⁰ So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky and all the wild animals. But for Adam no suitable helper was found. ²¹ So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. ²² Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. ²³ The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” ²⁴ That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.

As you can see marriage finds its foundation in God.

God intends for those who choose marriage to come together and become one.

In the same vein of having children versus raising them, it is much easier to get married than it is to stay married. Statistics conclude that 48% of all marriages end in divorce.

With that large percentage of failure staring at us straight in our faces it is imperative that we educate ourselves of some fundamental truths when it comes to building a successful marriage.

Let me share "5" truths that will, if taken seriously, empower us to live better lives with the one we love.

1. LITTLE THINGS ADD UP... 

Galatians 6:7-9 states; "Don't be misled. Remember that you can't ignore God and get away with it. You will always reap what you sow! Those who live to please the Spirit will harvest everlasting life from the Spirit. So don't get tired of doing what is good. Don't get discouraged and give up, for we will reap a harvest of blessing at the appropriate time."

• It is our personal responsibility to "do good" to one another.
• It is important that we express our love through action.
• Develop the mentality that we will always keep "winning" our spouses heart.
  

The little things really do add up. They can add up in our favor or not. The choice is ours.

2. EXPECT CONFLICT...

Ephesians 4:26 states; "In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry."

• Conflict is normal and necessary. Conflict resolution is the key.
• When there is a conflict stay on point. Tackle the problem not the person; remain issue based not person based.

3. COMMUNICATION... 

• Communication is the key to unlock your greatest future.
• We as married couples live in three zones:
• Really Good
• OK... Fine
• Really Bad

No couple got into one of the zones over night, but we can in the blink of an eye, and with one bad decision, leave the "really good" or "OK...fine" zone in a heartbeat. Ask yourself, and your spouse, what zone you are in. Be truthful, you are only hurting yourself by being in denial.

4. INTIMACY...

Different roads lead to the same destination... intimacy.

• Top need, whether communicated or not, for people is to be unconditionally loved and accepted.
• Talking leads women to intimacy. Men starve their wife's soul when they don't communicate or talk with them. Listening is vitally important also.
• Sex leads men to intimacy. Don't shoot the messenger... I'm just sayin'.

5. CHOOSE COMMITMENT...

Don't wish, don't hope, don't fantasize and don't even dream... just choose. Choose commitment to one another over all else.

In the end, love can simply be summed up in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7:

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Here is to all that become one and that they stay "one" forever.

sbb  13.2.11

939

For Sentimental Reasons  .  Nat King Cole 

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Happy To Meet Picasso (re-post 3.29.10)

Happy: delighted, pleased, or glad, as over a particular thing: to be happy to see a person.



Somebody said I should re-post some of my first pieces because I have more readers now than I did a year ago. So that is what I'm going to today and up through mybabyroc's first anniversary, March 23rd. I will still write original pieces during this time, but will add a couple of re-post pieces a week. The piece that I'm posting today was written in the spring of 2010 (March 29, 2010). I hope you enjoy!

The first line in Leo Tolstoy's book, Anna Karenina, states: "All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way."

I was reminded of this fact last week when my wife and son, Ryan, were checking out "daddy's website."

    Ryan & Mimi (summer 2009)

Upon closer observation of my site, Ryan realized that he has seen the picture of the old man (Picasso) holding the baby before. "Dad that is the same picture you have on your desk" he stated. I confirmed his belief then I asked if he knew who the man was.

Picasso
...this was my sites first "masthead".

"Poppa" he said,

"Close but no go" I replied. Can you say "Picasso?"

"....Picaaasssoo" he replied, in typical 5-year old fashion. I told him that Picasso was a very famous artist.

He then replied, "I know...Mimi met him at McDonald's today". 

My wife and I are still laughing.

I don't need to tell most of you reading this how wonderful kids are and how they really do say the darnedest things. I still remember when Bryce was five (He's 14 now) telling me and his brothers one morning that he "didn't pee to bed" because the pee stayed in his underwear. 

Classic.

    Bryce (summer . 2006)

aka. Will Smith

Really? You don't see it. Look at those ears again and get back to me.

Ryan's comment was brilliant on so many levels. It displayed how amazing a young child's mind really is and how great and funny a creative imagination can be. For many children, life is, and should be, so simple. They wake up and hit the floor running. Each day is a new day with no left over garbage from the day before. They like to play with their toys and (in my house) they might not know a famous artist when they see one but they can recite every word in a Phineas & Ferb episode. They don't obsess about the details...they just live.

It was at this very moment I realized how happy we are as a family. Everything hasn't been easy, at times it has been downright unbearable, but it's times like this, when a family member meets Picasso at McDonald's, that I truly realize how fortunate we are.

 sbb  "March 23, 2010" 

  480

What a Wonderful World  .  Louis Armstrong

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The National Anthem: A Honor; A Privilege

Privilege: a right, immunity, or benefit enjoyed only by a person beyond the advantages of most: the privileges of the very rich.

The guys on ESPN have a segment called "C'mon Man" on their "Sunday Countdown" show every Sunday. During the segment Tom Jackson, Mike Ditka, Keyshawn Johnson, Chris Berman and Chris Carter highlight unbelievable behavior on, and off, the NFL field. The segment is often entertaining and spot on. There is no better way to dismiss a bonehead move than saying "C'mon Man". 

It's synonymous with, "Seriously?" and my personal favorite, "Really?"

Well, if they were to have another "Countdown Sunday" show this week they would have to lead with the disastrous National Anthem sung by Christina Aguilera and one of the worst Super Bowl halftime shows in recent memory.

Seriously?

Is that the best the NFL could come up with?

I'm going to pass on and refrain from commenting on the Black Eyed Peas because I don't want to relive that experience ever again. For those keeping score at home Prince, U2 and Michael Jackson (PART 2 LINK OF MJ) were the best halftime performers ever.

I believe Prince to be the best. He sang "Purple Rain" when it was raining, with a prison doorag on his head and high heels on his feet. And with all that, he didn't fall, get electrocuted or miss one note, or word(s). Christina.

Talent doesn't need props, it just needs talent. Black Eyed Peas.

Michael, U2 and Prince I salute you. You guys got it right.

As far as getting it completely wrong that award goes to Ms Dirty herself. 

There were 111 million people watching Christina. 

That is 111 with six zeros. 
 

I think she is hot, I think she has a great voice and I think her performance was an embarrassment to herself, to the Super Bowl and to our country.

Christina Aguilera

It is a privilege and honor to sing our country's "National Anthem."

Get it right.

We have people that haven't seen their loved ones because they have been at war in the Middle East.

Get it right.

Soldiers have come back to America in boxes this year.

Get it right.

Leave your ego and your new signature arrangement at the door. Everyone knows you can sing... that is why you got the gig in the first place. Just sing the song, don't go Patti Labelle on me.

Don't get cute with a new vocal arrangement. Coke tried that with Coke Zero and look where that got them. It sucks. And "Gay", I mean "Glee", you suck too. 

When you get it right the first time there is no need to mess with it. We've been singing the Star-Spangled Banner since 1889. 

And singing quite well if I do say so myself. 

Note to self: if you do decide to change the arrangement of the Star-Spangled Banner you better be so good at singing it that we forget how the original is sung.

See Marvin Gaye.

My intention is not to be harsh, but point out that there are exactly 80 words in the Star-Spangled Banner. 

Get it right.

If the moment is too big and your nerves are too weak then make sure you have a teleprompter on the ground about 5 feet from you or use one of those glass teleprompters Barack is so good at using.

      

And don't give me that "if you know so much you get up there and do it." I can't sing, that is your thing. Abraham Lincoln once stated "a wise man knows his limitations."  

Well, I know mine.

Either way, too big of event or too weak in the nerves area, get it right.

I could go on forever, but I won't. Listen to the best National Anthem ever sung... thank you Whitney. 

Seriously, thank you Whitney, you're performance was remarkable in the 1991 Super Bowl. In my book you are forever forgiven for the Bobby Brown decision and the cocaine use because of your performance in Super Bowl XXV.

And for you Christina I have "cut and pasted" the words to our, to your, National Anthem.   

Francis Scott Key still must be turning over in his grave. 

C'mon man, get it right. 

 

 

“The Star-Spangled Banner” 

(National Anthem Lyrics)

O! say can you see by the dawn’s early light,
What so proudly we hailed at the twilight’s last gleaming,
Whose broad stripes and bright stars through the perilous fight,
O’er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming?
And the rockets’ red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there;
O! say does that star-spangled banner yet wave,
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

sbb 7.2.11

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Star-Spangled Banner . 7 year old little girl

...Amazing