Eventually you have to let go.
"I think most of us have control issues. We try to control the environment for our kids, we want to protect them, want to help them choose the people they hang out with, want to help choose the right attitude for them. We want to control things that especially affect our life." Those were the words of our Senior Pastor, Ken Murphy, this past Sunday as he wrapped up the sermon series entitled "The Island".
I agree with those words.
Many times our challenge is to recognize the destructive path we take when we want to take matters into our own hands and make a futile attempt to control the environment and people around us.
Good luck!
Let go... everything will be OK.
The one thing that I've learned during my short time on this earth is that I can't control anything except my behavior and attitude.
That is really about it.
Everything I try to control outside of that speaks to my arrogance, ignorance, immaturity and vanity.
When dealing with control issues in life and relationships there are three important steps to take into account.
Let me share.
Giving Up vs. Giving Over
In reading Luke 5:1-11 the reader finds out quickly the dissatisfaction and frustration Simon Peter and his fellow fisherman were experiencing.
"When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, “Put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch.” Simon answered, “Master, we’ve worked hard all night and haven’t caught
anything. But because you say so, I will let down the nets.”
-Luke 5:4-5
Two things that stand out when reading those two verses, and the complete passage, are the astonishment the men felt concerning Jesus and His ability, and desire, to perform this miracle on their behalf. God wants to help us and aid in every area of our life, all we have to do ask and wait with an expectant heart. It is called faith. The second point that needs to be acknowledged is the fact that many of us, when confronted with things beyond our control, tend to give up and give ourselves over to despair and resignation. What we need to be reminded of is if we really want to take complete control all we have to do is give it all to God; don't give up, give over complete control to the One that knows the beginning, the middle and the end of each situation and problem we encounter. When we give over instead of give up we display for the world to see that our hope and trust is in God not our self.
Letting Go
The key to giving over requires practicing the art of letting go. Do have children, adult children that are making poor decision after poor decision? Is an ex treating you with complete disdain and malice? More tragically is your ex treating your child poorly? Lost money in a business deal? Have you experienced a child being mistreated by a peer or coach? Or both? I could keep typing for days about the many things we hold on to with what we think is good reason. What we all need to recognize is that fully giving over control when it comes to our relationships, our dreams and our problems calls us to be willing to let go of our own issues; the issues that we hang onto and the ones that hang onto us. The core issues many of us struggle with are in the areas of unspoken and unresolved hurt, insecurity, low self esteem and the "I'm nobody" mentality, pride and the need to always be first and always be right, unrealistic expectations of our self and others, and finally, guilt and the inability to accept and receive God's forgiveness and to also forgive ourselves. With all of these issues, and any issue that holds us back, we at some point have to move on and let go.
Grabbing Hold
Ephesians 2:8-10 states:
It is God's grace that we are to grab a hold of and cling to everyday like our life depended on it... we need to because it does; our life does depend on God's grace. Picture yourself in the middle of a lake on a boat with your legs tied together, your arms tied behind your back and a 500lb stone was chained and wrapped around your waist. Then imagine you were thrown overboard. At this point death would be a complete certainty. And then, when all hope was gone and complete despair had taken residence in your heart and mind, another person out of nowhere appears with a life preserver and tells you to "grab hold". And as you grabbed hold they came to you, pulled you to safety and then cut all the ropes that had you bound and removed the stone that was weighing you down so you could be free. If that were to happen to you that person would be known as your Savior, the one who saved you and freed you not so you simply could return to the depths of the ocean; to your old way of life, but to live with renewed passion and purpose; to experience life anew. Remember, after we give over and let go then we are to grab hold and grab hold tightly to His grace.
Finally, is there anything or anyone you need to turn over control to the Lord? Is there anything, or anyone, you are carrying around with you like luggage that you would like to let go of and leave with God? If so fix your eyes on God, focus on the One that can rescue you, deliver you and redeem you. 2 Corinthians 4:18 says, "So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
What do you have your eyes fixed upon?
Is your vision focused on your problem or the One that can provide a solution?
Are your eyes fixed upon the seen and temporary, or the unseen and eternal?
"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith, --and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God-- not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do."
When we let go we are free to travel to a new and different place.
...a better place
Finally, is there anything or anyone you need to turn over control to the Lord? Is there anything, or anyone, you are carrying around with you like luggage that you would like to let go of and leave with God? If so fix your eyes on God, focus on the One that can rescue you, deliver you and redeem you. 2 Corinthians 4:18 says, "So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
What do you have your eyes fixed upon?
Is your vision focused on your problem or the One that can provide a solution?
Are your eyes fixed upon the seen and temporary, or the unseen and eternal?
sbb 25.10.11
1108
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