This piece was originally posted on 12.18.12 - sbb
Pain: physical suffering or distress, as due to injury, illness, etc. a distressing sensation in a particular part of the body: a back pain. mental or emotional suffering or torment: I am sorry my news causes you such pain.
"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you
rest. "Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and
humble in heart; and you shall find rest for your souls. "For My yoke is
easy, and My load is light."
-Matthew 11:28-30
Below
is a letter that I received last year that was enlightening and admirable;
heartfelt and appreciated. It inspired me to write a piece last year entitled; "What Are You Doing New Years Eve." I will re-post that piece on December 30th of this year. These same words, and an update sent a year later from
the same person, has motivated me to put pen to pad and share my
thoughts on healing. After Hurricane Sandy & the Sandy Hook
Elementary tragedy I think it is safe to say we all need to heal from something. The holidays often invite over some uncomfortable house guests. Bitterness, loneliness and grief are the names of just a few. Over the next few days I want to discuss healing and what healing looks like. I hope you join me in the discussion and look inwardly and evaluate
where healing needs to take place in your life. Remember, you can't
change, fix or heal what you don't acknowledge. But first lets revisit
the painful words of a hurting soul I received one year ago this month. Letters like this are the very reason I write.
Merry Christmas Grievers
I'm seriously putting
myself out there for this note, being the "Debbie Downer" for the
"Happ, Happiest Season of All", but I'd like to put a shout out for
all of those who are struggling, wanting to close their eyes and run from all
of this candy coated happiness.
I'm not turning atheist or anything; I don't use the word "X-mas".
I know this is the time of year that we, as born again believers in Jesus Christ, celebrate the season of our Savior's birth. He has come to set the captives free, the light of the world that once lived (and still some do) in darkness will see the glorious light of our Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Prince of Peace. (Isaiah 9:2, Isaiah 42:7) That alone is great cause for rejoicing. When I think of God sending his son to die for what I've done so that I could live forever in glorious celebration of the creator, I want to do more than a happy dance.
However, (this is the downer part) in my realm of living, people seem to hide the feelings of depression when it comes to the holidays. They are forced to put on their happy faces and pretend that everything is okay with their world. The people around them don't want to mention the pain to spoil the season.
Isaiah 7:14
Cooler temperatures,
shorter days, leaves are falling. Halloween comes and goes, then the
Christmas decorations come out. Before you know it, Thanksgiving.
Blink and the Christmas season is here. The season brings on a wave of
memories. I have personally seen a Hallmark, Lifetime Christmas.
I've heard people talk about the memories and traditions their family
experience. Old time ornaments from years gone by are hung on the
tree.
That's such a wonderful blessing to have as a reality.
But (insert the
Christmas carol screech to a halt), this isn't reality for a lot of people.
Christmas brings on hurt, loss, and painful memories. The holidays
trigger them multiplied. I know, I'm one of them. Struggling
through the holidays every year for a very long time, I go on a search for what
I can find of Christmas that will balance out the riot going on in my
head. The loss of dreams, hopes, desires, what you thought would
transpire in this season isn't exactly what you dreamed of for you.
How
do you get through the season?
Let me inform you at
this point, I am not a scrooge.
Acts 5:31
I like Christmas carols, I rejoice at
hearing of how families spend the holidays and put up the lights
together. Just this year, as part of my "make a new memory"
campaign, my daughter who was once totally estranged from me, came over and
helped me wrap presents and ate Thanksgiving dinner at my house. Don't
take for granted the things that happen in your life every day. Some have
no family at all.
How would you get through the season with no family at
all? (Insert prayer)
For me, this is how
I'm trying to change my attitude. First, it is what it is. I've got
family who love me the way they know how. I love those around me the way
I know how. I'm not experiencing my totally longed for dreams-yet.
But I'm making new ones. Putting the past behind me, most of it in boxes
so I can pull it out as a testimony of what the Lord has brought me
through.
I'm putting up new memories starting this year.
Matthew 1:21
Looking
for things in my world to fill the void, the loneliness that comes with
grieving. Like the time I experienced peace on earth goodwill to men at
the Goodwill store when an Iraqi and an Iranian met
and smiled. New memories, being intentional on finding them and not
letting the past ruin yet another year.
Learn from me, if you spend time
looking behind you, you will totally miss what's right in front of your nose.
Look in the present and forgive the past.
Heal your lost memories, make
new ones. Grieve, heal, gain strength from God our Father and trust He
will give you new memories. I know it's easier said than done because I'm
going through it myself.
What I'm asking is
this: Think of the ones who are grieving in any area of their lives during this
holiday season. Not everyone has the perfect holiday. I have spoken
to people who are not having a good time right now and I feel so sorry for
them. They're trapped in their emotions for fear of wrecking the spirit
of the season.
John 3:16
Please pray for them,
that the things that cause them pain be replaced with love. That healing
comes and they can experience peace and strength.
For those who grieve
from a death this year, I am so sorry for your loss. I'm so sorry for the
pain you must be experiencing. For those who grieve a loss of memories
and dreams of what you thought your life was going to be, I'm so sorry.
It may be a long road, but healing is there for you through Christ. He
makes all things new, heals painful scars of hurt, rebuilds new dreams, and if
it is His will restores old ones.
Try to look for
things God puts in your life today, He wants you to smile.
He wants you to have a hope and a future, not a longing for something that's in the past you can't redo. That's what I'm trying to do, find healing. And I will find it. My prayer is that other grievers find it too.
He wants you to have a hope and a future, not a longing for something that's in the past you can't redo. That's what I'm trying to do, find healing. And I will find it. My prayer is that other grievers find it too.
Merry Christmas grievers, you're not alone. (12.15.11)
sbb 18.12.12
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